I’ve watched Papillon, the movie this weekend. And it made my heart bleed and shine in the same time. Papi’s story triggered so many strong emotions. I went from feeling angry for the injustices that often happen in our human society to feeling the strong lioness roar inside my heart to feeling the pain of our world…That pain that will never completely go away. The human condition. When I saw Papi’s strong will to be free and survive the torture…oh! If he could survive that, then we can do anything. Why don’t we do it then?! Why we do hide in our comfort zones pretending to be doing our best when in fact we do nothing ?
When did we start being so comfortable in our society and begun to stop living? When are we going to wake up and make things better? When are we going to start to care? WHEN? When are we going to stop expecting others to change things? And start taking action and do our part instead?
WHEN?
When are we going to stop seeing that there is something else beyond merely surviving?
But for that to manifest, we need to be strong enough to break free from our ego and do stuff from our heart?!
When are we going to understand that this will never be just about us? But others too?
When are we going to start seeing that we cannot be happy by trying to make ourselves happy, but by giving, caring, by doing without expecting anything in return?
7 years in solitary confinement with so little food, violence, aggression, torture, injustice… And this man managed to stay sane and determined on his goal. How could you stay so loyal to Louis when in so much pain? Where did all this mental strength came from Papi? How did you do it Papi? What kept the flame burning?
It is in the most extreme and painful situations that true human connection happens..
INJUSTICE triggers an avalanche of emotions in me. Nothing drives me more crazy than when I witness or experience injustice. It’s one of those things that make me roar!! I cannot stand it and will NEVER comply with it. Will never stay silent. I can’t agree with humiliation and bending your head in front of someone else. I strongly believe truly strong people don’t humiliate but lift others up from their own pain and misery. They show the way. They embody the light. That is true strength.
I will never stop fighting for a better world. I will never stop having faith that we people can do better.
Violence is never the answer. Torture and suffering does not rehabilitate another human being. And unfortunately the system is not build to help us recover from our own pain, but the system often wants to break us even more, so that we can bend our heads and stop watching the skies…
I wished I could have met you …
Oh Papi, we have so much to learn from your story and the one of many other people…
How did he do it? What kept him alive and focused? What made Papi not to lose his mind in those consecutive 2 years of solitary confinement, and eventually 5 more consecutive years…7 years alone in inhumane living conditions with no human contact.. THE WILLPOWER! That heart roar that never sleeps. THAT always keeps the flame burning.
I cried. And I cried. And I cried. And had one of the most beautiful discussions ever with my darling Costel. It’s so good when our hearts connect and we understand each other. It’s so good when we stop being caught into our story and we see what lies beyond our own limited experience. It’s never about us. There is a God and a human in each one of us. That I am sure of! And I see it lately better and better…It’s time to rise up and do our part.
Seeing Papi on the screen made me see parts of me. There are things greater than ourselves.. Things that are worth fighting for. The world and the human society it’s so full of pain that we carry throughout the time from one generation to another… I feel so much pain for the pain of the world. And I want to do something to ease the suffering. I want to contribute!
I realize it better now. This journey has never been about me. My waking up process is not about me, it’s about finding the life and greater power in me and let it manifest through me. My job is to be strong enough to see what lies beyond the illusions of my mind and allow a greater force to unfold through me. And that’s what I’ve been doing all my life and intensively in the last 5 years…I just didn’t know it at times..
I want to contribute. And I’m ready to commit in taking action. I AM READY! I see it now.
I want to be of use to this world. TRULY OF USE!
I cried from the deepest corners of my soul last Saturday. I cried because I realize how deep this journey has been and keeps being. I cried because I don’t understand where is this strength and light inside of me comes from. I cried because I hope to be strong enough to stay determined on the path no matter how hard it will be. I cried because sometimes I’m afraid I’m too small to make a change and other times I realize this is so silly, there is something greater and stronger that wants to manifest through me that I’m not in charge of. We can all make a change! EVERY SINGLE DAY, WE MAKE CHOICES.
Make sure you make the good choices. One step at the time.
From my heart to yours,
Lavinia
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© Unfold Your Mat 2019
Göteborg, Sweden